Out on a Limb

I hate talking about controversial things. Even things I feel strongly about.

Especially things I feel strongly about.

I'm not the best talker, or writer. I want people to understand how I feel about a topic, but invariably I stumble over my words or leave out the crucial information. Then I feel like if people walk away thinking it's stupid or that all people who believe it are stupid...well that's my fault.

The other thing that frustrates me is when people in these conversations state their opinion and they're applauded by several people (I seldom believe the popular thing - sorry, you can ignore my blog from now on if you want) and then I state my opinion and I'm ripped to shreds because it's opposed to theirs.

I even go to a lot of trouble to say, "You don't have to agree, I don't expect you to" or "This is just what I think" and then, you know, "I think pigs make great childhood pets" or whatever weird opinion I have that is not quite the thing. But people come back to me with, "That's so condescending, I can't believe you would say you think pigs make great pets, when I've just told you I don't think they make great pets and I never had a pet pig"

And then I'll say, well, you don't have to agree that's just what I think and I don't have anything to back it up, although I've heard they learn tricks really well and they're actually really clean, etc. (I have heard those things, btw, from multiple sources but the only one I can cite is Johnny Tremain - great story...but you don't have to believe that).

So invariably the people will come back at me with, "Where are the studies!? Where are the studies showing that pigs are smart and clean? It's all propaganda from the pigs lobbying group!"

It's probably my own fault. I like to talk to people, be friends with people, who don't agree with me. I like to hear opinions that I could never hold. And I like to discuss them and how the people reached those conclusions and how I reached mine. Some people are great for that. And usually neither of us is ever convinced of the other position - but I want to understand where they're coming from. I want them to understand where I am coming from.

Instead I get into an argument over whether it should be allowable in public discourse for an opinion other than that person's to be presented with out a crowd of people present to applaud it.

Do you try to avoid controversial discussions? Do you find yourself getting sucked in anyway (I always do)
Are you in favor of pigs as pets?


  1. I am not a talker nor a writer :( I am a listener, somewhat weak, and easy to please in situations. Weak mind?? maybe. But I just listen to people their point of view and most of the time that will not change my own point of view. I hate arguments...

    1. Claudia, I hate them too. I just sometimes feel like I *have* to say something. Which always gets me in trouble.

  2. Part of me wonders if you recently read the same thing I did. My beliefs and opinions are vastly different from the people around me. I have no problem speaking my mind around my family and a few very close friends. But when it comes to my "online presence", I try to be the most neutral person in the world. That's really hard for me.

    Oh, and I love pigs. I grew up on a farm. :)

    1. Mandy, yes, I need to try and be more neutral with my online presence. That's awesome that you grew up on a farm :)